Melody's thoughts

I am in Florida. Great and smooth plane ride. Well, my week is booked. Going to Disney for the day one day. And Rachel is here eating food at my ear.

I leave for Florida in a couple days. I still have mixed feelings about going. I really want to see Rachel but regret spending that much money on a plane ticket. I got it really cheap and am making out really good, but I should be home working and getting money. I went car shopping again and am not having any luck. My parents are being dumb and not letting me drive their cars but yet flip out on me when I say I won't have a way to work then. They said it was my own dumb fault for not working enough. Now they are yelling I am working too much and not focusing on school. I am fed up with them and their mixed messages. Everything I do is wrong. I don't really care about school because they have given me no other choice. Since I have to pay for EVERYTHING I can't focus on school. Whatever. I am glad Kairsie is being nice and letting me drive Eliazar for another month, but when will my parents realize I am 17 and I can't live on my own yet. I wish I could just get a full time job and leave. They sat me down last night to tell me how disappointed they were in me. GRRR (Yes, this was my little brake down before I leave.)

CONGRATULATIONS BROOK

Augh my back is getting worse again. Apparently my neck is doing really good but my lower back is having problems. The chiropractor said it was from the rides at Hershey and being too silly with my friends. I don't know I just know I have been in a lot of pain (for those who couldn't see at the fall retreat.). So please keep praying for that. Went to walmart today and dropped off my cd of Costa Rica pictures so I can finally get them printed out. It is going to cost me $10....crazy I know. Then I have to go to AC Moore and buy stickers so I can scrapbook.

Got back from the youth retreat yesterday. I was really bummed. I had a great time and all but I wished I would have learned more, had more quiet times, and people would have been at worship to really praise God. It was great fun and games Sat, but I wish the speaker was better and I wasn't in so much pain. The one thing I liked was Friday I kept praying that something cool would happen. And it did I met this guy Brad and we talked awhile. Here he just moved here from Honduras and since I would like to go back to Central America we talked about it. God did show me some stuff this weekend. I just want more people to share the excitement of knowing God.

I am updating again today only because I was reading some compassion stuff and was really hit hard. 1,800 compassion sponsors have lost everything by Katrina. So not only are they suffering from losing everything but 1,800 kids have lost their sponsors. I wish so bad I had money to give. Maybe I will start fasting and send that money to compassion. The sponsors will be going through a hard time but America will make sure they have a house to live in and have food what about those in other countries who now won't be getting the money and won't have any help?

I echo Gabby's post for more passion for Christ. I know I am to blame for this too. I just can't get into ready my Bible right now. Maybe it is because I am reading the old testament stuff, but I still don't have the passion to pick up my Bible and read like I use to. Or go out and just drive and pray. Right now God has shown me little stuff that I know he is there. But yet Satan has also shown me he is right there ready for me to fail. Something happens and I keep flippin out which isn't like me. I do want to give a big shut out to all my awesome friends who are always there to talk to: Rach (all three), Brook, Kairsie, A.j, Cat, Lyn and Jon. I love you guys! Thanks for dealing with me.

Hershey Park was awesome. I love roller coasters well.....I didn't quite like the Great Bear because it hurt my neck way too much. But I had fun. Working again tonight. I am glad to be working again though. That way every day this week I work at one of my jobs. I just found out that in two weeks I have a meeting for graduation. How boring. But they have to measure me for my gown and stuff. I have to get my picture taken for the year book and have to write a little paper about what I am going to do with my life. My dad said I should take a picture of Hillary Duff and send it in instead of paying for someone to take my picture that I won't ever see because I am not buying a year book of a bunch of people I never knew but graduated with. Wow I am starting to feel old now that I am graduating.

Hershey park tomorrow, and it is Brook's b-day. Should be fun. So I looked at a car today and it was cheap and stuff but it was automatic. I have this thing against automatics since I learned on stick and love it, but then again I can hold hands if I get auto. I am still keeping it in mind. It has a cd player and big sound system. But get this guys it is WHITE AND PURPLE now can't you all see me driving a white and purple car? I don't know. O, and for those who are thinking why am I buying a car when I have one my dad said I need a new one because mine won't pass inspection because it needs a motor mount. So who ever gives me $600 first can have it. Inspected and nice. ANYHOWS I am going to go get a milkshake. (Rachel you are very welcome.)

Okay I am sick of people telling me to donate money to the Katrina thing and how it will help me. I know it is good to give money but sometimes you just can't. I would rather give to Compassion any way.
Work last night was awesome. I love my one boss Orlando. It was just him and I working. My first job was to clean the back office and front office. Easy enough. Then I cleaned the coke machine which is always a fun task because it is always gross any slimy. I honestly think Travis couldn't wait to have me back after the summer because he has a whole list of what I should clean. After finishing those duties I was bored and was talking to Orlando when we looked at Frank. Frank is skateaway's pet fish who lives in a vase. The water was brown and nasty. So Orlando gave me some money and I went to k-mart to buy water. (yes I was paid to shop!) I came back with two gallons of water and Orlando yelled at me because one was half empty....it was great fun.

Well, I leave to babysit soon just so I can get some money to get like three gallons of gas. But I start work tomorrow at skateaway again. I am sorta scared because I haven't work in months and they expect me to just come back one night and work. There is only going to be one employee with me too! Meaning I am doing snack bar and skateroom. Craziness. I know a lot of people think I am crazy going back there but honestly I love it because it can be a fun place to work. And I have seen so many people and built relationships there where I can witness. I am going to keep working there even though I am only getting enough money to get there and back. I guess after this month if I serious can't pay my bills I have to take up another job and back down on school.

I am looking into STAT teams. Please pray for me. I think I am going to send the stuff in soon and pray that they let me go next summer and help decide where I should go. Thanks Rachel for all the info. I am really excited to see where God is going to lead me. I have also been thinking about maybe taking some college stuff which is soo not like me.

Have people gone insane? When a helicopter comes to rescue people why on earth would you pick up a gun and shoot at it? Why do we have to send our own military to stop our people from killing each other over junk? We are so greedy it makes me mad.